written & photographed by Autumn & Jason Delong
Congrats, you’re engaged! You’ve made a huge step to commit to spending the rest of your life with your best friend. You now have an entire wedding to plan, including (but not limited to) picking your bridal party, colors, venue, photographer and videographer, wedding planner, florist, caterer, and determining your date & budget. Cue the realization of how much goes into wedding planning — and the stress that comes with it.
These tasks can feel all-consuming, and your mind can easily shift from the focus being on building your relationship to planning a party that celebrates your relationship.
Engagement is not easy. In fact, it was probably one of the most difficult and most busy seasons in our lives. You’re presented with a mix of emotions in tandem to the daunting task of throwing one of the biggest parties you’ll ever put together. A lot of time and focus must be put into planning.
The points above are all the more reason to take time to rest and enjoy one another. Remember that life is going to be busy. It is going to feel “busier” with every hurdle, new transition, and challenge — but luckily you will be taking this on as a team! Our caution is that ceasing to fight for a strong foundation of dating, continuing to get to know one another, and enjoying one another during a very busy season of your relationship can be damaging in the long run. What matters most is continuing to focus on one another and building a strong foundation for your future marriage.
01 / balance wedding planning + dating
During engagement, we found having two separate days each week (one dedicated to planning, and one to our date) were crucial. Taking time to rest and do the things you enjoy with one another can greatly help reduce wedding planning stress.
02 / lean into love languages
What is your fiancé’s love language? Do they like giving or receiving gifts? Do they appreciate physical touch? Learn to love this about your fiancé. Going the extra mile to show you care and acknowledge what makes them feel loved will go a long way, especially during your engagement.
03 / include your friends
Invite your friends into your relationship! Talking to them about what you adore about your fiancé, while also confiding in them about your fears, can help reduce stress. After all, we wouldn’t have been able to get to this point without them!
04 / talk about life beyond the wedding
Stay intentional in your conversations. Talk about life after the wedding. Create both short and long-term goals together.
05 / talk about your emotions
Communicate with your spouse about where you’re at emotionally in this transition, and ask them questions about how they’re feeling as well!
Ultimately, engagement is a short period in the grand scheme of your relationship, but it is busy. Take time to soak in the excitement, to rest and lounge around together, and not put too much pressure on yourselves.
about the delongs
If you feel like home together, let us document it. We’re Autumn and Jason Delong, a married duo who have been shooting together for the past six years. We’re travelers, creators, cat lovers, and aim to document memories through the images and art that we create.
photo by David Powers